by Dr. Steven Riser

INTRODUCTION:

In his book Bold Love, Dan Allender asks his daughter what she thought were the most important lessons he wanted her to learn about life. After some thought, she said, "To work hard, to always do your best and to never lie." Not bad answers. In fact, if you lived by those rules, you would undoubtedly accomplish a great deal in your vocation. But Dr. Allender said he couldn't quit asking himself why the word "love" was conspicuously absent from her list.

When people think of success, they rarely equate it with love, or with acts of compassion and kindness. In fact, we're often taught the opposite - to make it in secular world you have to be hard - boiled and ruthless. It's every man for himself or as some say, it’s the survival of the fittest.

However, Jesus taught us another way. In one of his most famous stories he told about a man walking on a road from Jerusalem toward the city of Jericho. As fate would have it, the man was almost there when a group of thugs jumped out from behind some rocks, beat him, robbed him and left him for dead.

Soon, a priest came walking by and the traveler undoubtedly thought he would get some help, but no such luck. The priest passed by on the other side of the road & didn't even look the man's way. Later, another religious man (a Levite) came along and he too passed him by.

Eventually a Samaritan came along. In those days, Samaritans and Jews didn't get along. You know what a Jew is; you know what a Gentile is; Samaritans are half of each. Jews despised them for the Gentile nature and most Gentiles didn't like Samaritans because they were part Jewish.

Even though the Samaritans were often targets of racial prejudice & had reason not to like Jews, this man put racial differences aside. He knelt beside the wounded man, cleaned and bandaged his wounds. He took him to an inn and told the innkeeper to allow the man to stay until he fully recovered; then the Samaritan paid the man's bill. The key phrase in this parable is in Lk.10:33: When the Samaritan saw him, he took pity (had compassion) on him.

Here’s my question: How would you rate your level of compassion? On a scale from 1 to 10. 1 meaning you’re a cold-hearted snake and 10 meaning you’re a Mother Teresa clone. What number would best reflect the love and compassion you feel for others right now?

PERSONAL TESTIMONY:

Permit me to share a word of personal testimony: Growing up, I was taught the importance of being kind and considerate of others. My parents believed in this value, they talked about it, they lived it and they tried to pass on to their children. I also learned very early that the Bible places a high priority on loving others. Paul said, “These three remain: faith, hope and love, but the greatest of these is love.” 1 Cor.13:13

Over the years I have seen many plaques, posters and poems reinforcing the need for love in this world. I grew up in the 60's when people were singing "all you need is love" and "come on people now, smile on your brother, everybody get together, try to love one another right now."

All my life I’ve heard that: loving others is the right thing to do. I always knew it was true. But during my more rebellious teen years, I confess I was more self-centered than loving. However when I became a Christian during my junior year in high school, I began to experience 1sthand, the power of God's love in my life. God gave me a new desire to love and I became more motivated to live a life of love. No one taught me this; it was the work of the Holy Spirit. (Gal.5)

However, in spite of all my religious training, my good upbringing, and deeply held biblical beliefs...in spite of my having been a Christian for almost 50 years and pastor for almost 40, I must admit that: I am still not as full of love for others as I'd like to be, or as I ought to be... 

moment ago, when you rated yourself in this area, perhaps some of you felt the same frustration and disappointment in yourselves that I have just expressed about myself.

Q: How do you think it would affect 1) your life and 2) your relationships, if you took some steps toward being a more loving person? Would it improve your relationships with your family and relatives? Would it make a difference at work? Would it have a positive impact @ NBEPC? The answer is obvious! Of course it would! Hence, the reason for our sermon this morning.

doubt if anyone here needs to be sold on the importance of love. We’re already convinced this is the lifestyle God wants for us. From cover to cover, the Bible teaches how important it is. In the 10 Commandments: # 1-4 = How to Love God and # 5-10 = How to love others. On one occasion Jesus said to his followers, "The way that people are going to know you are my disciples (or followers), is by your (agape) love for one another." (John 13:35)

Jesus made things crystal clear when he said..."The most important thing in life above all else is to love God with all your heart, and love your neighbor as you love yourself." (Matthew 22:38-39)

That's what constitutes true success in God's eyes. We need to redefine success by trying to get away from the old stereotypes of what people think of success, to considering what success means from God's perspective. Jesus summarized it by saying that true success is: loving God and loving others as yourself. Today, we're going to look a closer at the idea of loving others. If a person reaches all their goals in life, but along the way becomes totally self-absorbed and detached from others, they missed out on achieving true success.

God is not "anti-success." God wants us to do well in our various godly pursuits and passions. In the midst of it all, however, he wants us to keep our eyes on these two priorities. Earlier I asked you to put a number on your current level of love for others. If you scored lower than you would like, it might be helpful to consider a few reasons why:

I. WHAT ARE SOME BASIC REASONS WHY WE ARE NOT MORE LOVING?

1. Maybe you grew up in-or currently live in - an unhealthy home environment. Nurture is a key. Compassion breeds compassion: 1) if you experienced it at home it's easier to live it elsewhere. The same goes for work: 2) if your job is a relaxed, uplifting atmosphere, it's easier for you to "cut someone some slack," if they make a mistake. 3) If you're constantly being berated for every little slip-up, you're more likely to be harsh, unkind and disrespectful to others.

2. Another reason for a lack of love could be that you live life at an unhealthy pace. One lesson you learn as you read the gospels was that Jesus had time for people…he was never in a hurry.

Many people who sincerely want to be loving and compassionate find themselves so stressed out with their own responsibilities that they simply don't have time for anyone else or the resources needed in order to truly love and be attentive or concerned about the best interests of others.

This isn’t just a lame excuse; it's a fact of life. In the past 15 yrs. the average American's workweek has jumped from 41 to 47 hours - for people in management in has increased to 59 hours a week. Actual leisure time has declined 37%. Add to that the pressure of a 2 career family, or the incredible pressure of a single-parent family and the result is that many people live life every day in a crisis mode. Their lives are dominated by the struggle to keep all the plates spinning at one time. No wonder being compassionate takes a lower spot on our list of priorities.

Living life at an unhealthy pace of is destructive in countless ways. Worst of all, it undermines your ability to love. You just don't have time or the emotional energy to really tune in to others. Maybe you want to, but you're stressed out, frustrated, angry, impatient and short on spiritual resources. It may be that some of you may be running on low or almost empty.

3. Another obstacle in living a life of love is that some simply buy into the "me-first" mindset. This condition doesn't happen by "accident" like the first two - it’s the result of a sinful/selfish choice to put your needs and interests above others. In Phil.2:3-4, Paul said: “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.”

A very tragic example of this was seen in the story of David Cash who is a friend of Jeremy Strohmeyer. They were in a Las Vegas casino late one evening when Strohmeyer molested and murdered a seven-year-old girl. David didn't participate in the murder, but he was aware of what was happening & did nothing to protect the child. Refusing to help the girl was not a crime, Cash faced no legal consequences, but he became the object of public outrage. In an LA Times interview Cash said, "I'm not going to get upset over someone else's life. I just worry about myself first." This me-first mentality is destructive to the person as well as to health of society.
This is an extreme example of a malady inflicting us all: the tendency to put ourselves above the needs of others. I know that none of you are as cold-hearted as the young man in this story, but we're talking about degrees of selfishness here. We all struggle from time-to-time with the "disease of me." David Cash's story reminds us how far that type of thinking can take someone.

II. WHAT IS THE GOOD NEWS THAT GOD HAS FOR EACH OF US TODAY?

Maybe what prevents you from being more loving is how you’ve been nurtured, or your stress level, or a sinful, selfish attitude, but the good news is that you can overcome these obstacles and learn to be a more compassionate person. How? There's really only one way you can become more loving to others. You've got to experience more of God's love on a firsthand basis. You can’t impart what you don’t first possess - it can’t happen through you until it happens to you.

The first Bible verse many people memorize is John 3:16,"For God so loved the world, that he sent his only son" Jesus brought a new dimension of love which is so powerful, so compelling & so transforming that if one experiences it, it causes the recipient to radiate that love to others.

The apostle Paul, before his conversion, wasn’t exactly living a life filled with loving relationships. Like a lot of successful men, Paul was driven and intense. He was also, as we see in Scripture, hard-hearted, cold, and aloof. His primary objective in life was to eliminate the threat that Christianity posed to his Jewish faith. He did this by imprisoning or killing Christians. I rather doubt he was very aware or concerned, about the feelings of others - especially Christians.

In one day, through a personal encounter with the living Christ, his whole life changed. This hard-hearted independent, unemotional man was transformed into someone who was often surrounded by loving friends and ministry team members. He spent the rest of his life in an effort to help bring the love of Christ to others. What a great personal spiritual transformation! (Acts 9)

Jesus Christ is the one who brings about this incredible transformation. He can change you into a more loving person if you will allow him to...if you experience more of His love firsthand. This morning, I want to briefly share with you three ways you experience God's love firsthand.

III. WHAT ARE THREE BASIC WAYS WE CAN EXPERIENCE GOD’S LOVE FIRSTHAND?

1. Through a Personal - Saving Relationship with Him - I John 4:19

Becoming a more loving person begins with a personal one-on-one relationship with Christ. You can do that today. If you’ve never invited Jesus into your life and asked Him to fill your emptiness with his love, you can do it right now. It doesn't matter who you are or what you have done - God will accept you, forgive you, cleanse you and give you a brand new start in life. When you experience his love firsthand, it becomes possible to share his love with others. This begins by inviting him into your life as Savior so we can experience His forgiving love. Openness to Christ requires: 1) honesty, 2) humility, 3) repentance and 4) faith.

2. Through Ongoing Fellowship with Christ and His Church - Heb.10:24

Becoming a Christian is: a one-time event. Being a Christian is: a lifelong experience. We need to spend time in His presence on a daily basis...experiencing His love and compassion in our own lives...so that we can continue to share His love with others. When we fall out of fellowship with Him and His body - the church, our spiritual life becomes spiritual drudgery.

I need to make time daily to be alone with God-spending time with him in Bible study and in prayer. Without His ongoing input in my life, I can become distracted and/or disgruntled. I also need the strength I get from being around other Christians. When I spend time with people who love God, I experience the love of God firsthand and this renews my spirit and enables me to live more compassionately. You can’t live an abundant life of love if you are disconnected from the head (Christ) and the body (the Church). A third way to experience God's love firsthand is...

3. Through Consistently Living a Christ-Like Life - Being Actively Engaged In Ministry.

I hope that the success of WWJD doesn't cause us to miss the meaning of this powerful concept: our lives should daily be spent in an effort to imitate Christ in all that we think, say and do. The Bible challenges us to do what Jesus would do...to treat people like he treated people... to handle adversity like he handled adversity....to walk with God like he did...to respond to criticism and mistreatment like he did...to care for others like he cared for others. (1 Peter 2:21)

When we "do what Jesus would do" something amazing happens: not only do others benefit from our kindness, but we benefit as well. “A kind man benefits himself.” (Proverbs) When you show God's love to someone else, you experience God's love first hand. Many of us make the mistake of thinking that we have to "feel" a certain way before we “perform” a certain action. It doesn't always work that way. When we show God's love, we experience God's love…

CONCLUSION:

The Good news God has for us today is that: Christ can help us overcome all 3 obstacles that keep us from being a more loving and compassionate person:

1) If you grew up in, or live and work in an environment of anger and hostility, experiencing a personal relationship with Christ adds a new environment to your experience - an environment of love and acceptance that is strong enough to cancel out whatever negative influences you may have had or are currently living with. Your relationship with Christ trumps all other relationships! When it comes to learning to love others: Jesus is our model, our mentor, our master and our motivation (2 Cor.5:14) - the love that Christ has for us motivates us to share his love!

2) If you find yourself too busy and/or too emotionally drained to even think about being compassionate, then an on-going relationship with Christ and His Church will help you experience the love of God firsthand. Fellowship with Him and with believers will renew you and recharge your batteries. You’ll find yourself showing love to others that you never knew you had. Clearly, we can’t love the way God wants us to love with our own limited resources and strength. Hebrews 10:24- We’re called to exhort, encourage and enable each other to be more loving!

3) If you find yourself struggling with a "me-first' mindset, then striving to do what Christ would do will help you overcome it. You will find that when you are kind to others, you benefit yourself as well, because you experience his love firsthand. It is easier to give love when you have experienced love. And the way it works is that the more love you give, the more love you receive.

The principle enunciated by Jesus: it is more blessed to give than to receive applies to loving. This is what success really is. It's not about $, power or things. A successful life can be defined as: living a life of love - loving God, and loving others as yourself. Think about that!